SPOOKY LOOT

I am 25 years of age, and unfortunately too old to go out on Halloween and beg a gigantic stash of candy from the neighbors any longer.

Darnit.

But I remember getting a serious haul of treats every year when I was a kid...my brother and I (followed closely by our devoted parents, of course) would venture out into the chilled October evening, fighting our way through synthetic spider webs and "scary" lawn decorations, meticulously covering each street in several different areas of our town.  We persevered through cold, wind, fog, rain, and mobs of shrieking children with colored wigs and runny face makeup...those other little brats were no match for us, a candy-getting pair undeterred by any bloodsucking 4-year-old.  Outta the way kid!  It's 8:30!  People are closing up shop soon!  Just...one...more...MILKY WAY!  

We were: Trick-Or-Treating Professionals.

Upon returning to our lair, when the gathering was done, we spewed our heavy bags to gaze upon the night's collection.  A veritable waterfall of treats filled two large bowls, and we rejoiced devilishly in the smell and sight of the mounds of shiny candy.  The reds were so red, the yellows so yellow!  Ahhh...we ran our fingers through the little packets, lifting them, tossing them as a greedy cartoon man might do with a pile of cartoon coins.  Our mother allowed us to consume as much as we liked on Halloween night, but then she stored the bowls away in an inconvenient location and would ration us one piece per day until the supply ran out.  Yes, we ate Halloween candy well past Christmas.

The last time I ate a piece of Halloween candy after Christmas was many years ago. My costumes have all been sold at summer yard sales, and these days a younger generation takes to the streets on October 31st.  I guess I'm a grownup now.  But every year, when the wolves are howling and the mist covers the moon and the grocery store is selling treats by the 5lb bag, I remember all the loot of Halloweens past--plus all the fun I had with my family whilst procuring it--and the child in me still craves a handful of candy corn like nobody's business. 

Happy Halloween.

TOP FIVE BEST HALLOWEEN CANDIES

5. Skittles

4. Milky Ways

3. Kit Kats

2. Reese's Peanut Butter Cups

1. Twix


TOP FIVE WORST HALLOWEEN CANDIES

5. Crunch bars (sorry, the chocolate is so waxy!)

4. raisins (come on...who do you think you're fooling?)

3. Bottle Caps (unless you like to eat sour chalk)

2. Mary Jane Peanut Butter Kisses (the mystery meat of sweets)

1. Smarties (it's a love 'em or hate 'em thing...well, I hate 'em)